When 10-year-old Lily adopted Max, a golden retriever with big brown eyes, she couldn’t stop hugging him. It was her way of showing love — just like how her parents did with her. But every time Lily wrapped her arms around Max’s neck, something felt… off. Max would freeze, his ears would lower, and he’d sometimes pull away gently.

At first, Lily thought Max just needed time. But weeks turned into months, and Max never wagged his tail when hugged. He never growled, never snapped — but he didn’t seem happy either.

That’s when Lily’s mom, a vet tech, gently explained: “Dogs aren’t wired like humans. For many of them, hugs feel like restraint. They can’t run, they can’t move freely. Even though we mean well, it can stress them out.”

Lily was heartbroken. Her hugs were meant to comfort Max — not scare him.

According to a 2016 study by psychologist Dr. Stanley Coren, more than 80% of dogs in photos being hugged showed signs of stress: lip licking, turned heads, lowered ears, and wide eyes. It’s not that they hate affection — it’s just that hugs as a form of affection don’t translate the same way for canines.

Lily decided to change the way she loved Max.

She learned to read his body language — the happy tail wags, the playful bow, the gentle nudges. She gave him space when he needed it and replaced hugs with belly rubs, gentle strokes, and treats.

The change was clear: Max became more relaxed. He started sleeping next to Lily’s bed. He followed her around the house. And one day, out of nowhere, Max leaned into Lily and rested his head on her chest — his version of a hug.

This story reminds us: Love is not about doing what we think is best, but learning what the other needs.

So the next time you go in for a big squeeze — pause. Watch. Listen. Maybe your pup is telling you something in silence.